Day 8 -- Worst Habits

The prompt for today is... Worst Habits

Does anyone really want to admit their worst habits? Guess it's time to face the music.

1. I think the mother of all of my bad habits is being my toughest critic. I tend to be a perfectionist/people pleaser, and therefore if I do something, I'm always trying to figure out how to do it better. I don't like to fail! For example, just last week, I was asked to bring a pumpkin roll to our tailgate party. In my 40-cough cough years, I've never made one. So as not to face potential disaster by serving my very first one to a crowd of people, I made a practice pumpkin roll earlier in the week. It cracked. It tasted great, but didn't look that great. I mean, once it's sliced, you can't really tell that it's cracked... but I could tell. And that wasn't good enough. So when it came time to make THE pumpkin roll, I was meticulous. I made sure to baby it as I was rolling it up. It cooled. It looked perfect. I spread the filling over it, then started to roll it back up. It cracked. 😠 At that point, I didn't have time to try another one, so I sliced it and just accepted the fact that it wasn't perfect. And you know what? People ate it, and it was delicious. I need to get over myself!

2. I clench my teeth. I've done it for as long as I can remember. I've worn a mouth guard when I sleep for at least the last 20 years. I'm not gonna lie, it's super sexy. 😂 However, here of late, I've been waking up with headaches nearly every day, and my neck/shoulders were killing me. I had started seeing a chiropractor again because my back was all kinds of jacked up. I mentioned this to her, and she started poking around, and found the issue... I'd been clenching my teeth so much that the muscles around my mouth, ears, neck, and shoulders were like rocks. After seeing her several times, I've been headache free, and now I'm hyper-aware of when I'm clenching my teeth. It's years & years of bad habits that I'm trying to break. It's not going to fix itself overnight, but I'm working diligently on trying to reverse it.

3. I take a lot of things personally, I internalize most everything, and I overthink everything. These three things combined equal the perfect storm. I get my feelings hurt, I won't say anything, and then I replay a conversation over & over in my head and end up with anxiety over everything. Welcome to inside Jenni's brain! It's scary in here. **I feel like I should explain -- if I get my feelings hurt & don't say anything, it's usually because I just need to step back, take some time, and analyze what happened. 99% of the time, time fixes it. I just like to look at things from all angles.

4. I tend to jump on the defensive as my first response -- more so with my husband than anyone. I think it's just because I want to be everything he wants, and when I feel that I'm not, I jump to defend myself. THAT is a bad habit. 99% of the time, it's me overreacting over something he was just trying to tell me. Or, see numbers 1 & 3. 😉

I think that's enough of my worst habits. I know I have more, but this is all I feel like sharing for today. Ha!